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27 September 2016 @ 11:08 pm
Since July-ish, Luke has inexplicably been calling one of my best friends "mom". Don't know how it started. We didn't encourage it because honestly it made outings a bit awkward and Assumptions have been made by many a park-goer, cashier and Cast/Team Member. We also didn't DISCOURAGE it because that makes him dig into it more. So pretty much we acknowledged that that was a name choice he was making and moved on.
She and I have also, due to our third party in our trio of insanity being frequently indisposed, been hanging out more on our own (with Luke) more often in the past few months.
Last weekend the whole gang got back together (like NORMAL, thank God). And Luke was suddenly back to calling her by her given name. I mentioned it out of ear shot of him and she'd noticed it too. "Little sad..."
Then Sunday the rest of our group abandoned us in favor of their house. And suddenly it was "mom and Mimom" (pronounced My Mom, like from Home) again.

We're weird but hey.
Feelin': confusedconfused
03 April 2016 @ 12:32 am
All last week (well crap, I'm writing this on a Saturday... So the week before) was Luke's Spring Break. And this year no one was pregnant, so TerraNova went on vacation!

We headed up to NC on Saturday and made rather remarkable time, given that we had 8 and 4 year olds and a 7 month old and took 3 cars (chosen by gas mileage [aka: Chad and Amy's trucks stayed safely home]) this time. TerraNova needs to stop expanding. We lost Molly and her brood after a disastrous turn on I-75 that my GPS app steered Chad, Luke and I around while everyone else got stuck for a time. Glad we made good time, though, because the mountain road we were on was less "mountain roady" and more Dueling Banjos. And there was one hairpin curve with gravel that made me grateful for A) daylight and B) Chad driving instead of me.
The cabin itself was very nice. It had a pool table, which is always a plus, but was missing a hot tub or a fire pit. As a bonus, all adults had beds! Actually, everyone had beds except D, who slept in with Amy, and Sadie of course stayed in Molly and AJ's room in her pack and play.
We did better on cooking for ourselves this time, but still found some really good local places. I was amazed at how many little hole-in-the-wall places had clam strips on the menu. And the catfish was a-maze-ing at the BBQ place we went. We also went bowling one night and I recall it being remarkably better priced than the chain lanes we have here.
It took two tries, but we got to go zip-lining and caving in Tennessee as well. We were originally scheduled to go Monday and set out right on time... Then the road we needed was closed with 7 inches of snow and ice. The detour would take an extra hour and a half, so we just went back "home" when zip-lining couldn't reschedule our tour for same-day. The next day worked much better. The cave was a tour and was kinda awesome. Apparently I have no issues with claustrophobia, but heights remain a problem according to looking over one edge into an underground canyon... I did much better zip lining this time, though I tried to have a panic attack at the start. Again, heights. And throwing myself off of them is counter-intuitive. But at the end of this tour, I actually jumped when he said go, as opposed to last time we went. We all learned to go upside down. I mostly accomplished it... Well, my feet went up and my shoe grazed the cable... And I let go with one hand. Considering I had no intention of trying, I count it as a victory. Luke went upside down on two different cables. The first time he didn't let go, the second time, which was much longer and a side-by-side "race", he and Amy stayed upside down the majority of the time and he let go with both hands!
Sunday it snowed. Up at the cabin, it was little flurries that the boys (and me) tried to catch on tongues. We got a little accumulation overnight, maybe 1/3 of an inch. More than Luke's ever seen! I made a snowman with what was on the seat outside by the fire ring that stood maybe 4 inches high. Obviously there was accumulation elsewhere, and we drove through it on the sides of the road on the way back from Zip lining. Glad it wasn't on the way to it because for that we did our one 5 minute break at a dam Chad wanted to stop at, and we had NO other wiggle room in the schedule. Apparently the other car drove through it on the way up, because they remarked that they thought we were a little late because I was going to have a seizure if we didn't stop. On the way back, we did pull over and had a mini snowball fight (I was wearing jeans and a tee-shirt, for the record, having left my hoodie in the other car) and the adults made snowmen. Without gloves, Luke was content to watch me torture myself, but Chad eventually provided his for me to continue acting like a legitimate 5 year old. All day, we'd been seeing people driving around with snowmen on their hoods, so Chad made one to put on there, then mine joined it. Amy used hers as ammunition and pelted us with him. Neither made it back to the cabin, but it was fun watching them.

The trip home was longer, but we also stopped at Goats on the Roof, a little roadside place where they literally have goats. On the roof. You can run goat food p to them on a variety on contraptions, like a bike that runs a cup up an incline, or a hand crank one. They also had some goats on the ground to feed as well. We bought the obligatory over priced branded candy, shared a bag of overpriced dirt for the boys to pan for gems, and tried on fake coon skin caps. Eventually we made it home.
Now we're jsut waiting for the school schedule for next year to come out to start planning the next one!
14 November 2015 @ 12:37 am
Luke is going to drive me insane.
He has been giving me the worst time about everything involving school and I never know what is going on until it hits the fan. Then I have to push and push to get an answer from him until he's near tears or at them.
He is:
- not doing his homework
- not turning in half-finished homework
- not completing class work in math that is coming home with failing marks as a result. A 38% came home today. Of the 15 questions on the page, he DID 5 and left the rest blank. Previously he got a 27% on an UNTIMED assessment in math. If I recall correctly, it was something like 16 questions, he finished 9 of them but only got 5 right (I know those aren't the exact numbers but it gives you a picture of what's going on)

I don't know what he needs. I've tried to correct the homework issues with no TV unless homework is done rules, but my mom and I forget because for THREE YEARS of school, he did his homework faithfully at homework time in aftercare. And if we happen to ask, he denies that he has any. He's also not allowed to watch TV on weekends unless he has completed all of his backdated homework. The last two weeks, he made the choice to just plain not watch TV. Last night I checked his folder and found everything for this week done! Woo, its working! Nope. That was last week's math homework (not sure if he even turned it in). This week's is somewhere (?) in his backpack. Not done. And not turned in.

I now have a teacher conference for next week.
You know its not good when its not a note that comes home, but an email received only an hour and a half into the school day.

I don't know what he needs. Does he need stricter rules? Does he need more grown-up guy time? Does he need more Mommy time? Does he need math drills at home?

According to him, he just gets distracted because he'd rather be reading. That used to translate in to "Why aren't you peasants done yet? Oh, I can read now that I'm the only one done? 'Kay" Now it apparently translates to longing to pull out a book SO MUCH that he doesn't actually do his other work. Which delays pulling out the book.

I just have no idea.
Feelin': worriedworried
02 November 2015 @ 11:10 pm
We went camping the weekend before Halloween. As usual, it seemed like we needed more days, but that's impossible to do consistently when Luke is in school and grades are starting to count. So I ended up checking him out 1.5 hrs early on Friday in order to drive 6 hours into GA. Well. It was supposed to be 4:45. But two small bladders in my car and caravaning with an infant makes that time difficult to make.
It was still fun, with a day trip to Stone Mountain, putt-putt and... yeah, that's about it. Our camping spot was awesome and our loop was small, so we could just send the boys to the playground, which was within easy yelling distance and direct line of sight. I'd like to stay there again some time, with more time to explore and hike. Stone Mountain made me renew my desire to get in better shape. I would've loved to hike up it with AJ, Amy and Chad but that just wasn't going to happen. Instead we rode the cable car and Luke made everyone "awww" when he said "I think we're so high, we can see heaven!" At the top, I learned that my fear of heights that doesn't always manifest, especially if my feet are firmly on the ground, does NOT like mountains. I'm not 100% certain if that was all me, or partly being in charge of a 4 year old who runs head long into everything without always looking and an intense anxiety that he was going to somehow fall off the mountain under my watch. Luke fell while running in a circle and took several layers off his elbow on the granite but that was our most severe injury in several camping trips, so yay! On the way down the mountain, the infant decided she was way past dinner and made all of us and all of the other passengers regret all life-choices that led to that point. And my ears wouldn't pop and I almost fell over, saved narrowly by grabbing Chad and holding on for the rest of the ride, just in case.
The ride up was way more magical.
20 October 2015 @ 11:21 pm
I didn't realize that all of our group was not aware of Luke's parentage. The one person I took for granted knowing didn't, which was a slightly awkward conversation that bought out a bit more sympathy for Luke's decidedly attention seeking behaviors where the men in our life are concerned. He's seriously toned it down from when he was younger, but its still there.
The main girls are aware because one of them lived it and both get to hear about the fallout when Cameron appears and disappears.
Like the lovely bit about Luke's name!
I've wanted to change his last name to mine since he was 3-4, before he would know better. Cameron agreed at the time but "couldn't" get the paperwork notarized. Luke got to the age where I decided to ask what he wanted. He wanted my last name. Boom. Adamant. I explained that either way he would share a name with people he loves, dah dah dah, whole schpiel. In everywhere but school, he started introducing himself with my last name, or asking if he can. For birthdays and Christmases, he asked for his "B------ last name". Can't locate Cameron for longer than two months at a time.
FINALLY he seems settled. Finally they were building a relationship. Luke asked me to send Cameron the name change papers, so I ask for his address. He refuses to give it to me. Instead he talks with Luke and tells Luke he won't sign any papers until Luke is certain. And Luke being 7 (maybe he was 8 already) at the time, backs down because his dad told him to think about it. I haven't broached the subject since. I don't think the two have TALKED since.
Two weeks ago, Luke asked me to order his midnight blue belt for karate. He'll be coming up on his testing soon and one can preorder it to have it on display on the wall, waiting for you to earn it. Preorder requires a last name, because its embroidered with name and #. Just out of the blue, he goes, "Hey mom. Can you order my belt? I want B------ on it."

Soon I'll casually question what that means to him. If he wants it and Cameron won't do it, there are ways to make it happen without his cooperation.
Feelin': determineddetermined
13 October 2015 @ 10:36 pm
Also of note!

Mentioned to Luke he hasn't talked to his dad in awhile (that's as close to "wanna call" as I usually get) after I consulted my phone and saw he'd last texted over a month ago, but I know he hasn't called since then or even close to prior to that.
Luke goes "Nope."
"Do you wanna?" I query from the front seat of the car (I don't usually offer in the car. Bluetooth turns off music for me if he makes a "private" call [not over the overhead for everyone to hear])

Okay then. Moving right along.
13 October 2015 @ 10:29 pm
Two "family" camping trips in two months. This might be a record, and I'm glad of it. I'm not such a fan of the Cub Scout camp outs because in the entire Pack, there is one other single mom who is there, and she's not always there for the camp outs. So its me sitting off by myself playing on my phone while the guys talk shop and let the boys play a wide variety of games categorized by "this team versus this team, sticks as weapons, let's kill 'em!" Luke needs a designated male for such things.

"Family" camping is a bit more fun. The adult to child ratio is higher, the age ranges are wider and less conducive to death (one of the three children hasn't fully discovered her feet, so....) and there are other females for me to converse with when the men find their geek side, which doesn't quite line up with my geek side all the time.

Last month was the annual Disney camping trip, which started as Luke's birthday party and has since evolved out of it (there are fewer presents each year, lol) but he still considers it to be "his" camping trip and that's what counts. We always plan to cook more than we do, Luke is always slightly grouchy by the last day (lack of sleep turns him from 8 to 15 very quickly in terms of attitude) and we never use enough sunscreen, but its always the best.
I was reminded today of it because when Luke was very proudly wearing his watch he got on that trip (currently sleeping in it...) After we got to camp and got all set up assisted by Eric, the only one to beat us there, Eric presented Luke with this watch. I know he didn't buy it specifically for him (he explained to me it came in his Loot Crate and he decided, already having a fancy one himself, to give it to Luke) but Luke didn't know that. And Eric made a little mini-speech about his dad giving him his first watch and he thought Luke might be big enough to have his first watch (then got self-conscious and changed subjects) and told him which hand to wear it on (something I've tried telling him when he would put on other such things that never sank in coming from me, but Luke reminded me this morning that he was supposed to wear it on his left and put it on himself) and how to wear it right. It looks massive on his tiny little wrist, but he's proud of it.

This month, we're going to Georgia with the same group, minus some, plus others. (Eric might've been a jerk and pissed some party-goers off, so he got "oops, not enough room"ed this time...) (He might also not be the A#1 role-model of our camping boys, sharing a few too many similarities with Luke's father when it comes to handling co-ed relationships, but Luke doesn't know that) Its gonna be awesome though. There's a mountain involved, so its got that going for it. My mom even advocated for taking Luke out of school early if we need to to not be driving in Georgia in the dark.
08 June 2015 @ 12:38 am
We weren't doing Star Wars Weekends (SWW) at Disney this year. Its hot and crowded and hot and gross and I hate bugging my ticket source for tickets. She's an employee, but we still usually hit Universal instead. She does Disney with others ever since the Terranova crew's children got old enough to need their own tickets.

But Cameron has been back in contact with Luke. THey had a visit on Memorial Day. Which had its awkward moments but overall went well. But since then, Luke's been initiating all contact with him (previous to the last time he dropped off the face of the Earth, the deal was that it was not up to Luke or I to make the effort at this relationship). Well, technically I've been initiating the contact cause I'll suddenly go, "You haven't talked with your dad in a week, wanna call him?" I've gotten a few "laters", but I think those will start to multiply soon because he remarked today that the only time they talk is if he calls.

Anyway, I digress.
Cameron came up with this idea to take Luke to SWW this year. Now, he doesn't know the magic of NOT telling the small, easily disappointed child about plans until they are finalized. As far as Luke's concerned, even our big trips involving hotel stays booked 2 months out are spur of the moment adventures in case work throws me a curve ball. So as soon as Cameron posed this idea to me, I started my prep of how I was going to supervise this (One successful Memorial Day visit after two years of absence does not make me ready to had Luke over), not knowing for sure Luke already knew. And with this prep came a contingency plan.

So when Cameron flaked out (and he did. A combination of not actually having a paycheck to pay for these massive tickets combined with not doing any research into when SWW takes place resulted in disaster), the only hiccup was how excited and then disappointed Luke was when I told him we were going to SWW, ("with my DAD?!?") without his dad. And in hindsight, I should've gotten Cameron on the phone and let him explain it instead of me making excuses for him again. Gotta get out of that habit now that he's around again.

But we had a great day. Luke was plenty happy to have Courtney and Erik with us (Eric apparently was almost pulled into a family thing but was informed in no uncertain terms by Courtney that he CANNOT not show up for the kiddo). We haven't done Hollywood Studios since Luke's been getting more adventurous and we (used loosely, cause that was all Eric as usual with his "Let's do this! You don't want-? Nah, You'll love it, let's go" *reassuring hand on the back of the neck so he can't run) got him on Rockin' Rollercoaster. Which he loved. We weren't able to do it a second time due to time constraints, but he was promised first ride AND a Fast Pass next time. We had another first for doing Toy Story Mania, which was fun but not really worth the wait without the Fast Pass, which we had thanks to preplanning. And got to ride Star Tours and got a new scenario, though Luke wasn't the rebel spy this time. Oh, and the Frozen show, which was HILARIOUS and nothing of what you'd expect it to be. We also took in the Ray Park talk/demo, which Luke was somewhat interested in (it was Eric's activity pick) but grumpy that the kids with some special, highly priced wrist bands got to do a (rather lame) "lesson" with him on stage.
Its also amazing how little Luke needs ice cream and snacks when told he can buy them with his own spending money. He saved that for a plush Stitch-as-Yoda.
Feelin': contentcontent
02 June 2015 @ 10:49 pm
I need to enter my brain into a trope BINGO contest. Cause when Subconscious's Best Friend shows up in a dream, God only knows.
In less than a week, I've checked off confront a fear because of cute guy and building furniture leads to alcohol and sleepover (innocent one), which I think hits several categories.

Ugh, kill me now.
Feelin': frustratedfrustrated
Tunes: news
26 April 2015 @ 10:53 pm
What brings me back to LJ after such a hiatus? Mortal embarrassment. The kind you ignore as much as you can until you're far enough from everyone else to tell your best friends in privacy.

You know how, in romantic movies featuring a single parent unlucky in love, 70% of the time the kid makes some form of power play to get their parent to see what's right in front of them with the person the kid thinks they should be with? And the audience goes "awww" when it works?

Well, in real life, when your kid tries to sneak you into holding hands with someone? You completely ignore what's going on as you both turn it into a one armed wrestling match with a 7 year old.
The adults won. And will likely never speak of it again.
Unless he gets stealthier as he grows.
Cause he almost accomplished his goal before we both noticed at the same time and I think that's what he's going to take from today's experience.

In related news, 4 years has apparently not put a damper on his plans for a certain guy with regards to our family.
Feelin': embarrassedembarrassed
Tunes: news
28 December 2014 @ 11:18 pm
My friend coined a term for when you have a crush on someone and start to talk and can't stop. Most of the time until you embarrass yourself: Word vomit.

I was carrying on an imaginary conversation with someone and word vomited to MYSELF.

And we wonder why I don't date.

This may or may not have had to do with going to Luke's Nina and Grandaddy's house and the "I fail at life" feeling I get, through no fault of theirs. I only have my own issues to blame. But I SERIOUSLY need something different to think about on the 4 hour drive home than what it would be like if I had a husband for the visits (I think I even complained about this LAST year. Likely invoking the Subconscious's Best Friend. Which I won't mention entering into thoughts this year, cause then we'd be getting repetitive). Or if I did, I could be the one to volunteer as tribute for having the next grandbaby so that we can keep the nifty trend. This year, there were 7 grandkids age 7 and under. We need another one to keep up for next year, 8, 8 and under. Carling, mom to three of them already, volunteered for a fourth. lol

When I turn 30 next week, I won't have had a date since I was 24. Unless you count playing pool with Karate Boy once. Which I don't.
As I recently told another friend, if Cameron hadn't turned into Cameron, I would've already been married and had two more kids.
Feelin': melancholymelancholy
Tunes: Dexter
14 December 2014 @ 11:28 pm
Grinchmas was celebrated by the Terranova crew today. AKA, we all went to Universal. When the grown-ups got boring by sitting to watch a concert, Eric and Luke almost immediately took off. "We're going for a walk, we'll be back."
They cam eback 15 or so minutes later. They almost rode the Mummy, but Luke got freaked out in the queue and claimed he just wanted to ride it with everyone.
I raised an eyebrow at Luke. "You know Eric is capable of keeping you safe. He won't let anything happen to you, and wouldn't take you on anything that was dangerous." (Luke had never ridden Mummy and was understandably nervous.)
He contemplated this for a few moments, then, courage restored, declared himself ready to try again.

They came back victorious this time.
After we saw enough of the concert (Molly was cold and we were all hungry and Luke had school in the morning), Molly and her crew departed and the rest of us rode Mummy AGAIN. Luke is slowly making his way through all of the rides. If only Epic would come with us more often.
Feelin': proud
04 December 2014 @ 10:42 pm
Bullying is such a buzzword right now, I worry about it. I just want Luke to grow up to be a good person. Empathetic. Someone who is willing and able to step in and go "enough", even if not in those words. I honestly counseled a kid today at work that middle school sucks. And his best bet is to put his head down and just keep going (he got in serious trouble for something some older kids kinda framed him for. If you believe his story. And its hard not too. He's not much bigger than your average 4th grader and his voice hasn't thought of dropping)

But it reminded me of 8th grade technology class. We sat in small group tables and one girl that sat with me decided for some reason that has slipped my mind, to pick at me. And I, being in middle school and wanting to fit in, lied. Because what 8th grader admits to sitting at home and watching TV or riding my bike alone being their main pass times? So I said I hung out at the (stereotypical) mall. And she got this shark look in her eye and said she hangs out at the mall ALL THE TIME and never saw me there. Where am I?? I had no comeback.
Then this guy at the table, can't remember his name but I know he was this tall, thin, athletic black kid who this pain in the butt had a crush on. Honestly, I may have too, he was just that popular kid everyone liked. Well, he looked up at her all of a sudden out of nowhere and goes "You know why you never see her? She hangs with me. And you'll never be good enough to."

THAT is the kid I want my son to be.
Tunes: news
16 September 2014 @ 09:21 pm
Damnit New Girl! You set unrealistic dating standards! "The last person you kissed was NICK. And that was four months ago!"

I have you beat, Jess! The last person I kissed was CAMERON. And that was 5 years and 8 months ago!

When I "take a break from dating", I take. A. Break.
Tunes: New Girl
14 September 2014 @ 10:05 pm
I assume that some day in the future, Luke will again see his dad. We were working toward that, with tentative plans for a group trip to see Guardians of the Galaxy all together. Cameron is a superhero nerd, they could bond over it. Then Cameron lost his phone and dropped off the face of the earth again just about a month ago, right before Luke's birthday. (Not arrested again, I checked)

I don't know how that will go. But I assume Luke will not run across a parking lot to give him a hug, then proceed to climb all over him, eliciting the amusing, "He's on my butt. Again."

His dad's a flake, but Luke has good people, good men in his life. And if his dad isn't going to be around, that's all I can ask for.
Feelin': thankfulthankful
Tunes: news
26 August 2014 @ 10:45 pm
So, Facebook?
Reminding me to wish my friend a happy birthday? Like it.

Not so much when said friend died last year of cancer, not reaching his 29th birthday that I'm supposed to be congratulating him about today.

Stephen, I know we drifted apart in high school, but I loved ya' buddy and was proud to have known someone so smart and kind and called you best friend through those horrible middle school years.
24 August 2014 @ 10:39 pm
I don't budget. I'm not proud of it, nor am I ashamed. Its just how I roll. (shoot me if I use that again anytime soon?) I occasionally do the math in my head and it comes out in the positive, so I feel like I'm all good. I use cash for gas and eating out (unless a real restaurant is involved because that's rare and usually involves work) because it makes me more aware of what I'm using.
(there's an exception for gas and that's at my favorite cheap station that I don't always get to hit and is only reliable for going to and from Orlando, so I fill all the way up)
My other idea of budgeting is using the occasional coupon and saying no to Panera requests from Luke if we're going to the movies that same weekend.

But I had an idea. My mom likes to take her change out of her pocket every night and save it. I weed through my pocket change if it gets too heavy. But I've decided that I will be taking out all of my single bills nightly and saving them. This might not do much because I usually operate in round numbers, but I'm going to try it.

Back when I was poor as hell, I planned to save $5 a week in order to take Luke for a snowboarding vacation when he is about 10, but that got put aside by a powerful need to eat sometime that week and never picked back up. I should do something about that. When he's ten, I'll only be 33 and I think I remember the mechanics of snowboarding. I vividly remember the literal scrape I put on my rental helmet...
Tunes: news
23 August 2014 @ 12:25 am
I'm disappointed in Sin City 2.

A) it took forever to make. I was a sophomore in college when the first came out. I'm 4 years out of college now. And I took 5 years on my degree.

B) The only reason I knew it existed was seeing posters

I adored the first movie. Like, completely in love with it. I own the special 4-disc edition. There was much weasling and finagling to get to see it in theaters and after Hassan backed out, it finally involved my first blind... date? Friendship? Thing that I told my roommate to call 911 and trace the dude through my computer if I didn't come back?
(I'm pretty sure he's the first hipster I ever hung out with. Before it was cool to be a hipster [see what I did there?] but he made an amazing lasagna and was the first man I ever went grocery shopping with. Which somehow stands out as a milestone. Prolly 'cause my dad NEVER went grocery shopping.)
21 August 2014 @ 12:12 am
According to the Magic 8 Ball in Toys R Us today, I will date Subconscious's Best Friend within the year. And we'll get married. But have no other children.

I'll take it.

Its my current only hope.

Yes, I'm an adult woman who asks an 8-Ball questions about my love life. Is there a problem?
10 July 2014 @ 11:19 pm
I'm just gonna leave this right here.

In case anyone has been curious about my job.
Tunes: TMZ
09 July 2014 @ 09:07 pm
Occasionally I wonder if I, as a grown woman months shy of being *shudder* NOT a 20-something, a mom, a home owner, a worker at a Serious Adult Job, should own more normal shirts versus graphic tees.
Then something comes up on TeeFury and that obnoxious idea if shoved away as I dive to order a Toothless shirt or a TARDIS shirt or a--

I'm waiting for Dark Tower to swing around on there for me, and stalking obsessively hoping for a Dr. Hooves for Luke. Otherwise someone will have to make him one for his birthday.
03 July 2014 @ 11:55 pm
My family was discussing the new house long before I bought it. I was excited to paint inside. My mom is excited to landscape. But my dad was kinda stuck. The house doesn't need much handy-manning. I have a contractor because the bank made me that is doing the little fixes my dad would have done and a new deck that, had we personally known a licensed contractor, dad would have been helping with to reduce the cost or time.

So Mom and I threw out there that I have a half acre of wooded property. Maybe he could build Luke a treehouse.
My dad got all excited. "I've always wanted to build a treehouse!"
Then why didn't you build me one when I begged for years and finally ended up with an elevated playhouse??
Feelin': grumpygrumpy
02 July 2014 @ 12:25 am

This is not what the title says it is. This should be titled: Luke and Chad, An Illustrated Guide.

Because I'm up way too late, I was looking through things on Pintrest and stumbled back across that and had to share. It triggered one of my favorite of their interactions. I can't remember where we were but Luke was being a pest himself and was hanging ALL OVER Chad. Hugging him from behind, practically climbing him, laying halfway on top of him if Chad dared sit down... Finally Chad looked at him and went, "One day, you will remember all of this and be completely embarrassed."

And Luke grinned at him defiantly and said, "No I won't", made this weird kinda-purring animal-type noise and snuggled his head into Chad's ribs.

If there ever comes a day that Chad quits coming to play with us, I am resigned to it.
30 June 2014 @ 10:04 pm
As I sit here with the TV on mute and no one to interact with (even my cats have shunned me for Outside), I wonder why I'm all down in the dumps all of a sudden.
I just bought a new house! I should be excited and researching color combinations and awesome ways to do a kitchen that still fits with the style of my house!
I'm also feeling all of my introvertiness so I should be happy to not be forced to interact with people! When I have one of these spells, I absolutely ABHOR my job. Well, the going out and talking to people that might have no desire to speak with me aspect of my job. The sitting at my desk sharing "You would not believe THIS" stories with my coworkers? I can do that.

So what's up, Ms. Everything is Awesome?

I made the mistake of looking in a full-length mirror yesterday. And while I have known academically that I am overweight (and a lot more than I ever thought I'd let myself be) (AND I've lost 10 pounds since I started keeping track of it!) holy shit it hit me. Luke is an adorable, fit, healthy kid. He's almost got abs. He can do pull ups. (I thank karate. He's in the advanced class now, BTW and someone FINALLY corrected his jumping jack form last week since he wouldn't listen to me. And why should he? I look like I've never done a jumping jack in my life!)
That was a lot of parentheses and I apologize. Tl;dr: I'm fat and my kid is not.
The point is, I looked in that mirror and said to myself, "Holy shit, no wonder you haven't been asked out since Cameron." (worth noting at this point in my self-esteem spiral: Cameron first asked me out in summer of 2006.)
And since recently Subconscious's Best Friend has been "Fully Conscious and Still Around", that directly correlated to "I would never ever EVER (EVER) have a chance with him no matter what. Thank God he's never (correctly) interpreted my friendliness as bad awkward flirting."
Feelin': melancholymelancholy
30 June 2014 @ 12:24 am
I own a home. As of Friday, all of the paperwork is done. Tomorrow I get my keys. So sometime after tomorrow, the fun begins. Painting. Decorating. Ripping out carpet that is all stained up and for some reason covering wood floors... I truly do not understand people who like carpet. Blech.

My brain decided to celebrate this turn of events by reviving Newbie and making him still work with me and call me at ass:30 at the new house because he was on-call and so tired he couldn't make it home (admittedly 45-ish minutes from the office). The dream changed right as I let him in and informed him, "Food. Bathroom. Couch for sleep. Or my bed is upstairs where I will be. Pick one," and went upstairs.

In this time, I'm also prepping to go to LeakyCon as an assistant to Molly. By prepping, I mean I've brought a bunch of crafty things, figured out exactly how I'm going to do what I need to do and haven't done it. But I managed to promise Luke his very own one in Ravenclaw colors... So I got that going for me?
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Tunes: Burn Notice